Monday, October 24, 2011

Manchester Reunion

Has anyone here got a beanie hat they can lend me
Im going to a big Manchester Reunion on Friday
We're heading back up north, all the old lads
And Ill need a beanie hat
Its just something we always used to wear, a beanie.
Out on the town

I need a harrington jacket too.
You know, with the checks on the inside,
fred perry or something like that.
We all used to wear a harrington jacket
and a beanie hat
It wont be a reunion without the two of them

Has anyone got a set of roller blades,
for my manchester reunion.
I cant go up without them.
Ill be laughed off the trian
We used to blade up and down halls
do you know what I mean?
Fucking classic

tortoise? Couple of lemons?
Disabled kid? Wigs?

I need them all for my manchester reunion
oh fucking happy days

Sunday, October 16, 2011

Self Portrait on The Train

Writing my lines on my screen
Im better than others here
They can t see
part from the bloke next to me
what a clever boy I can be
Writing my lines on my screen

Digs this old chair. Digs in your back
Gives you the hump.
Gives you the hump.

Riding my horse
its such a laugh
My mother's dead
Still least ive got my horse.

This train its going to crash
And we are all going to die
I wonder if the geezer next to me
is worried

Saturday, October 15, 2011

Train Lady #2

Turning my pages
Reading my sheets
Thats what Im up to

All of these articles
Loads arent there
Turn another one over
At bloody last!
A puzzle.

Got to text my husband
Im going to be late
Got to let him know
He'll have to wait

I dont want to read glamour
I dont want any mag
Just want to text my husband
The time drags

Oh Best Check My Email

Oh best check my email
Oh best check my email
Oh best check my email
Oh best check my email

Oh best have a Gu pud
Oh best have a Gu pud
Oh best have a Gu pud
Oh best have a Gu pud

Oh best check my email
Oh best check my email
Oh best check my email
Oh best check my email

Oh best have my coke
Oh best have my coke
Oh best have my coke
Oh best have my coke

Oh best check my email
Oh best check my email
Oh best check my email
Oh best check my email

Oh best hear my tune
Oh best hear my tune
Oh best hear my tune
Oh best hear my tune

Oh best check my email
Oh best have a Gu pud
Oh best have my coke
and best hear my tune

Oh best make the best
of my time on this train.

Fit old lady

On the train
opposite me there's an old lady
shes fit
but now she's opened up
her 'bacon lettuce and tomato sandwich'
and fiddled with the insides
it's all over the table
and that has put me off

What Happens in Vegas #2

In the amusement arcade
on Great Yarmouth Parade
'Vegas'
I kill people with a giant chupa chup
I won on the grabber

What Happens in Vegas #1

What happens in vegas
Stays in vegas
when im fucking johnny vegas
its thoughts like this that give me comfort

TNT Lorry Park just north of Milton Keynes

In the corner of a car park
there are lorries
and there is space
late at night
for us

breathing in the dark
the space is not meant
for us
but for the lorries instead